This Instagram from @stef_sjo has really got me thinking tonight. There was a stage in my life, and by stage I mean ever since Instagram came out to up to a few months ago, that I was attached to social media. I would spend a good hour or two a day scrolling through pretty pictures. I would be on a friends page, then off to their cousins page, then off to that cousins...sisters and then repeat. After a good half hour I would have Insta-stocked that friend's cousin's sister until there were no more pictures to see. I had no idea how I got there and who it was, and chances are I would never meet them, ever.
I would get down on myself if my life did not look as fun/pretty as their lives. I pictured how I could make my life look as great as all my fun social media "friends", and make prettier pictures. I honestly can't believe how good of a sport my husband was during my social media obsession.
I can't believe that I'm going to share the story behind the picture above. But I guess I can count this as my contribution to the #bonafideconfessions campaign for this month! When Ryan and I were in New York for Medical school interviews, we decided to take the Staten Island Ferry. Me being the social media/pretty picture obsessed person that I was, had envisioned a picture on the balcony of the ferry. Yes, I think I got the picture in my head from the movie, "How to Loose a Guy in 10 Days." So we entered the ferry and all was well....until I realized that that particular ferry did not have a balcony to take the picture?! WHHHATTTT.
After some solid debating and persuading on my end, I convinced my husband to get on another ferry and do the whole ride again. Never mind we had limited time in NYC, that it was about 20 degrees outside, and that we were both 'hangry' as can be. I had my heart set on that picture and it took priority over actually enjoying the city. AH. I'M INSANE! But when all was said and done, I thought that it turned out all right and obvi posted it. THAT is why Instagram is so deceiving! During the picture above my husband probably wanted a new wife, my hat was blowing off, we could not feel our fingers.. and I was still so worried about getting my "How to Loose a Guy in 10 Day Pic."
I realized something had to change, after launching Be Bona Fide I can honestly say I have made a conscience effort to be present and to just enjoy the moment, rather than trying to capture the perfect pictures that I have envisioned in my head. I am happier and my husband no longer wants to run. Haha. But really, I cannot tell you the difference that I feel. I have become more confident and happier. Don't get me wrong, I still love a good picture as much as the next person, but am no longer willing to let that picture get in the way of me experiencing LIFE.
I'll keep you posted on how my emotions are feeling/changing as I try to keep Being Bona Fide. Stay Tuned.
XOXO Gossip Girl
wait. thats not right....